08.26.2008 - 1:24 p.m.

Today, I have been cataloging all the things I dislike about my life, and seeing if I can even imagine the details of the life I'd have without them...

I imagine a life in which I am happy. I don�t think I have a job, in this life; if I do, it is similar to but definitely not quite identical to this one. I am not working on a Master�s I don�t care about, but I do read a lot, even academic stuff.

I weigh about 150, and I play club volleyball once a week. I have written a novel and am beginning work on another while I edit it. I don�t spend a great deal of time on the internet. I don't have a cellphone or a cable connection, and my partner is fine with that.

If I don't have a kid yet, I'm working on one, because I have no doubt it's the right thing to do. I don�t travel very often, but when I do, I travel far, and I stay gone until I miss home. I don�t remember what it felt like to be afraid all the time.

... As a whole, it is either a very useful exercise, or it is the emotional equivalent of digging into an open wound with a spork.

I'll let you know which once I figure it out.

-stonebridge

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