06.17.2004 - 1:49 p.m.

I remember a friend asking me once, figuring I'd know, why so many girls stay with guys who treat them like crap. I remember knowing the answer to the bottom of my recovering soul, although I wasn't able to articulate it at the time. I remember thinking, "Of course they stay."

The other day, I was reading an email from a girlfriend about how unhappy she was, how she needed a new job or home or something.

The reason has something to do with emails like that, "this sucks and that sucks and I hate my life but things with Boyfriend are still delicate, but pretty okay." It's something about believing life is always shit, and that Darling Schnookums is the only thing keeping if from crapping out completely. It's as good an explanation as the idea that Boopsy-woogum is the one bringing the rest of it down, with the added bonus that you never have to risk life without him. Everything is completely predictable, and always hurts in exactly the same way. Somehow this is good.

And here I am, years after that inarticulate conversation with my guy friend, reading her words and thinking, "Good god you're miserable. Just. Fucking. Leave!"

It's funny how the moment you figure out how to explain something, it stops making sense.

-stonebridge

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