12.19.2001 - 5:23 p.m.

My day at work has been like this:

9:00 am- Arrive two minutes early, all set to be mad productive as soon as I get out of my daily check-in with boss.

9:10-10:40 Explain to boss the mysterious workings of photoshop so he can make a spiffy holiday card to send out to his friends and relatives.

10:40-12:00 Watch boss make the card. In attempt to preserve productive vibe, make mental list of all things that need to get done. Offer to begin doing them, but am required to stay in case boss needs me to (see previous item.)

12:00-12:30 Get real work done.

12:30-1:30 Check-in meeting with boss; am given list of remaining tasks for project due at end of week. (Readers, do note that the master list of these tasks was generated previously, while boss was busy arranging snowflake and candycane images around his daughters.)

1:30-1:35 Begin remaining tasks.

1:35-2:30 Discover HUGE ASS PROBLEM. Try everything, including banging head on desk and offering small sacrifices to the computer gods. Discover that while problem was caused by approximately four erroneous mouse clicks, solution will require at least 4,832.

2:30-3:30 Back in boss's office. Stare at walls while boss looks through file cabinets for bits of text for website. Slightly more patient this time because I can tell he will give me the wrong ones if I don't remind him which ones I need every few minutes.

3:30-4:30 Second audience with computer gods. Perhaps because these are the elder gods of Mac instead of the previously encountered gods of computers I know how to use, they are unappeased by my tears of frustration and staunchly refuse to scan text without reversing the black and white, to convert the scan to pdf without crashing, or convert to scannable text at all.

4:30-5:00 Mentally compose letter of resignation while downloading the rest of the text I need for tomorrow.

At least tomorrow, boss won't be in until noon.

-stonebridge

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